ADDICTION: Blindfolded Mayhem

It’s late and dark and the time is mine alone now…

I’ve earned this right,

this right to drink my fine, sweet wine haven’t I?

I worked a job most people won’t work

and survived…

That’s worthy of a drink right? Of course it is…

And the first blindfold wraps around my eyes….

I am so excited..

I live for this, I really do—It’s a ritual;

I lovingly pour my small bottles of Chardonnay

into my stainless steel cup

and place it to chill…

so I can then chill…

and wait for the next blindfold to be put in place.

They are small bottles after all right?

No harm there, I can control how I feel…

I know when I’ve had enough right?

Come on, I’m a grown man—

Don’t tell me I don’t know what I’m doing.

The stainless steel cup is nice and frosty now

as is the wine inside;

and I begin to drink it—slowly at first,

waiting for the first small wave of that numb, warm feeling

to spread through my body;

like a woman laying her hands all over me

and stroking me from head to toe with her loving skin.

But..a little is never enough…

I turn on my favorite show; “The Prisoner” from 1967…

Number 6 and the Chardonnay make the world a better place

because I can now merge through the monitor into The Village itself

and the blindfolds can increase in number

and wrap around me

and numb me even more….

The cup is empty. Damn.

Its ok though..wifey’s asleep now…

I can sneak to my emergency stash

(I keep spares in my shoes, after all one must have his priorities)

and I can drink just a couple more…

They won’t matter because I’m still in control….

And a new blindfold wraps around my face entirely…

The cup is empty again…guess it’s a wrap.

I stop the stream of the episodes I’ve dreamt through;

Dozing in and out of consciousness and,

numb and giddy

I get up and swoon over to the table

to steady myself so I can,

once again, stumble into the bedroom.

The blindfolds get in the way though

as I have to go to the bathroom and,

upon arrival there,

lose consciousness altogether and fall

into the Garden tub headfirst

busting my head open

and taking the shower rod with me.

Silence.

Thank God she didn’t hear.

I’ll write about this later.

Just gotta get up now—

which after an eternity I do..and have wet myself.

And there’s fresh blood to clean up….

Oh well, at least she’s asleep still.

I clean it all up as dizzily as is possible and then

I change my clothes silently and clumsily

and swoon into the bed…

head splitting with pain and spinning with drunken spirals;

I fall asleep—

and the blindfolds wrap around my soul and whisper…

“See you again tomorrow”

As my body has already begun to shake…..

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