We begin—
Timer set for five minutes…
And counting…GO!
This is what it’s like
Dealing with the brain
I carry around in my head
Each day and that I struggle
To keep focused
On the least little thing
While also reacting to
Everything around me
At the same time.
Questions from all directions,
answers needed and now—
“Oh a kid’s going off!
Better go get them!”
Am I going to get beat up again?
Oh well, let’s go—
And —
Here we are—it’s all ON
Screaming
And clawing
And crying
And scratching
And me in a mask and rubber gloves
That are being torn off
Trying to contain and restrain
The fury and fire and misunderstood storm
Behind those blue eyes—forever it seems
Eons pass and, After a calming time
It stops…
But my brain is on fire—
A river of fire that runs through my brain
From behind my nose and eyes
And through the center of my head
Between my lobes and down into my spine
Faster and faster and FASTER
Pumped by adrenaline and mania and fear
Reacting to overstimulation and fight/flight mentality on steroids
–now it’s the time I’ve said enough and I’m writing this exercise and test…
I’m thinking and seeing in my mind’s racing eye
For NO reason
of grassy fields,
Iced meadows,
A house with a broken door
A roof collapsing on a ghost’s head
While the floor rises up to meet him from his grave-
Switching to visions of motorcycle riding gorillas
Riding rampant through a city of nuns
Spreading pamphlets about the Jehovah’s witnesses,
Switching visions to an army of scarecrows marching to protest matchboxes,
Switching again in my head to how I’m doing on the timer and how I’m
Going to clean this up
Or wrap it up
Without going on and on and on…rabidly spitting foam
Fingers flying
Mind racing
Heart pounding
Pulse shooting
Words, words, words
Thoughts, thoughts, thoughts,
Lust, rage, fear, anger,
SHAZAM! It’s Captain Marvel!!
…I’m so tired now.
GO ahead..Time me.
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